A Taco In the Quarterback's Hands Is So Exciting

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Brett Favre, in his new Jets uniform, takes the snap and steps back in the pocket, holding a taco instead of a football. What would his fans think of that? Well, it is my belief that when you see a quarterback holding a taco it means that ANYTHING could happen, you have no idea how the play will turn out. When a quarterback throws a taco, the ingredients could fly about and land almost anywhere. Sour cream could splat upon the back of the guy playing center. Tomatoes could be intercepted by an opposing team's cornerback. Bits of lettuce could be seized and gnawed upon by hungry linebackers and this might slow the game down as the crowd waits for them to get their fill. Pieces of shredded cheese might fall to the ground and be recovered by a safety and ran the other way for a touchdown. Bits of ground beef, though, are heavy enough and could actually fly through the air in such a way that a wide receiver could catch one of them and run it in for SIX! That is why I think it is appropriate to place a taco in the quarterback's hands because it symbolizes the excitement one feels when you see the quarterback take the snap and step back. You never know where he is going to throw the ball or if he is going to get sacked. And perhaps he could tackled so hard that the snapping of his poor bones could be analogous to the crunching sounds you'd hear when a big heavy linebacker stomps on a taco shell with his cleats?

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Sage Rosenfels Now On The Long List Of Sputtering Mediocre Viking Quarterbacks

Oh boy, Minnesota Vikings fans! It's time to get excited because the Minnesota Vikings have acquired Sage Rosenfels! Yeah, right ! Like there was really ever a chance that the Vikings would get someone like Bret Favre or Donovan McNabb! The Sage Rosenfels era has begun and you can tell that everyone is soooo excited. I just keep cursing about what happened to Daunte Culpepper. He was the only thing that looked even close to a solid, long-term franchise QB for the Vikings since I've been a fan, and now we are back in the muck of having to watch our sputtering, impotent offense let all our talent on defense go to waste. It's like a reverse of how the Vikings were during their brief "Super Bowl window" era between '98-'00 when they had Culpepper, Moss, Carter and Robert Smith at running back combining for an explosive, record-breaking offense. Of course, back then it was the DEFENSE that stunk. Yeah, GET YOUR POPCORN READY!! I just can't wait to watch the glorious competition in training camp between Rosenfels and Tarvaris Jackson! Hahahaha. I'm also a big Indianapolis Colts fan and the first thing I thought of when I heard this Rosenfels news was that bone-headed play he made as the Texans' QB when he fumbled the ball last year and gave Indy a win they probably didn't deserve.

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Pat Buchanan and Football Metaphors

I love it when any politician or pundit injects football into the political discussion and Pat Buchanan is someone I've noticed doing it alot. Buchanan continues his prolific use of football metaphors in his new essay, "Mr. Obama, Welcome to the NFL!". In this essay Buchanan is using football metaphors to describe Obama's recent experience with the rash of negative campaign ads by McCain and accusations of Obama using the race card. He is saying that against Hillary, Obama was essentially in the "amateur college league" and now that he is in the general election and playing against the "pros" of the "NFL" he is "getting hit in the mouth" and he is going to have to learn how to hit back! This is SMASH MOUTH FOOTBALL, BARACK! That goody two shoes, aloof "new kind of politics" might have worked in the Democratic primaries but the Republicans have no reason to hold back!

Buchanan is definitely a brawler and he seems to like football alot. I can see him making a pretty good linebacker back in his younger days. Buchanan made a good football analogy on Dan Abrams' show last night. He said that when Barack Obama warned people that Republicans would try to make them afraid of him because "he doesn't look like the other guys on the dollar bills," he was essentially guilty of making a "false start". What Barack said was fairly inocuous but the McCain campaign, analogous to a defensive lineman responding to a false start and brutally busting through the unprepared offensive line to tackle the quarterback, went for the jugular and accused Barack of "playing the race card". It was a brilliant use of football metaphor on Buchanan's part. Football fans nation-wide should be thankful for a guy like Pat Buchanan who has the skills, cleverness and admiration for football to so meaningfully make it a part of the election process. How cool is it that we will soon have the NFL season starting at the same time one of the most historical presidential elections in our nation's history is heating up?

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Vikings "Tamper" With Brett Favre?

Holy Hope! I actually read this morning that the Packers were seeking action against the MINNESOTA VIKINGS for alleged "tampering" with Favre in an attempt to get him on their team. The Vikings have long been my favorite NFL team and I was just joking with a friend that it would be cool to see Favre go to the Vikings. I just can't seem to share the same amount of optimism for current Vikings' starting QB, Tarvaris Jackson, that Vikes head coach, Brad Childress, does. Jackson just doesn't seem very good and that he will always throw dumb interceptions; and he has a hard time staying healthy. I know Childress insists that Jackson is developing and the Vikes want to spend money filling up other positions but I dunno, Jackson's pitiful play cost the Vikings a win against the Redskins late last year and a trip to the playoffs with a winning record for the first time since the 2000 season (in 2004 they went to the playoffs at 8-8).

The Vikings acquired Bernard Berrian this offseason at wide receiver. Adrian Peterson is out to show there will be NO sophomore jinx for this outstanding running back. The Vikings defense has really come along, especially when it comes to stopping the run and all we need is a good, solid consistent QB to keep the car from going into a ditch. I personally feel that Tarvaris Jackson's poor play is very likely to lose the Vikings at least 4 games this year all on its own and it would great to get Favre in for one last chance at getting him another ring.

The Vikings play Monday Night Football the first week of the season AT Green Bay. How cool would it be to see Favre come out on the field wearing PURPLE? Hahahahaha. It's sounds too cool and I'm not going to hold my breath, but hey, like Barack Obama says, we gotta have HOPE.

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